Let us consider the universal domain of power, beyond and behind the human, polarizing game of victim and abuse, victim and perpetrator, abuser and abusee. First, power is a universal energy sourced by life and essence and the deepest connection to the unapologetic alive essence that we are. Power does not hide or hurt. It does not punish or even make sense. It simply IS. So, what happens when we experience our power through our hearts, our value through our empathy and our unabashed presence with compassion? No masks, no victim, no arrogance, no hiding.
The evolution of the collective consciousness is moving beyond the ‘me too’ movement and into a power shift of epic proportions. It will be messy. To begin with, when the victimized feminine stops hurling her power through defense and blame, co-dependently waiting for someone to be different or better, she, the feminine, will instead stand tall in her own authority. She will claim her vulnerability and her strength through her heart, funneling it through her truth and knowing. On the other hand, when the victimized masculine is no longer reacting to disrespect and censored strength without heart, he will claim his deepest power too, through empathy.
The masculine and the feminine are in dire need of one another, begging for each other’s wisdom and clarity. To find their way, he needs to feel his heart and her pain and she needs to feel her anger and fear. And this could be a clearing practice at this evolutionary cusp of greatness and integration. Can the feminine in you feel the burning rage at the very bottom of your belly to experience her power beyond feeling like a constant victim? To even feel it without becoming angry? And can the masculine break his heart open enough so that he can finally channel his power through his heart, like a Samurai?
Feeling the energy form of expansive anger and the piercing power of love are ways of surrendering to the power within. Then we gain the possibility of experiencing the quality of integrity, the warrior’s code of ethics, and the moral fiber that keeps us from disintegration – literally. Integrity is that which weaves the power of trustworthiness between strength and beauty and power and love, generating peace within and without. In the truest sense, there is no other to oppose. In fact, the moment a warrior believes that there is an opponent, he has lost.
Adyashanti has shared that all negative energy is looking for resolution and that we can either let the energy weigh us down or, we can bless it and let it go. May we bless the victim mentality within and release it and just as importantly, bless and integrate the power of anger. Perhaps it is helpful to consider that before any moment of abuse, before the insidious frozen shackles of shame and the imprint of fight or flight take hold, there is a moment that is often lost to the memory. In that moment is inherent anger, an energy signature that says, I am valuable, I am life and you have no right to hurt me. Anger is that knowing of life as valuable at its very core. And that knowing of value as an unapologetic expression of life can inform and reform how we move through the world.
Any therapeutic session worth its salt will take their client through that range – from hurt to anger to compassion. Problematically, since many people bypass the anger and go straight from hurt to forgiveness, we miss the healing agent. This due to our beliefs, experience and judgements about the energy of anger itself and the fact that the feminine has learned to avoid power all together and become an empath. Her destiny to excessively reach out, feeling the reality of another in order to ultimately know, ‘am I safe?’
The nondual experience of power and compassion exists despite blame, guilt, fear or abuse, yet to know these two dimensions as a perspective from which to live one’s life is apparently rare. Not many people are willing to live without feeling safe as the victim and not everyone is willing to be in their power without opening their heart. This is indeed our calling at this most precarious moment in evolving consciousness. To make this journey we all need healing, transcendence and remembering. For some meditation may be sufficient or a therapeutic setting, and for others, being in nature may reveal these qualities most clearly.
I know I mentioned that this process might be messy, so have courage and strength, stay loyal and respectful – toward yourself. Refining a new way of being in the world may not be an easy task, and yet with these warrior like attributes, we may shift more effortlessly, together.
Nic Higham is the author of ‘Living the Life That You Are: Finding Wholeness When You Feel Lost, Isolated, and Afraid’. He is based in Leicester, UK where he offers nondual therapy and coaching based on the teaching of Nisargadatta Maharaj (Nisarga Yoga). www.nisargayoga.com